Howdy! Lately I have spent my days imagining the life that I want to share and experience with my husband and children. Much of this time has been spent imagining and wondering exactly how I want to raise my children. Now, no offense to my parents, I don’t necessarily want to raise my children quite the same. My parents did the best that they could at any given time. It’s not out of disrespect for my parents, and for the most part they did a great job. It’s just that there are some areas that I feel could use some improvement.
As a child I never really saw my parents love and affections for one another. In fact, much of what I saw and experienced from my parents involved much screaming, yelling, arguing, and belittling of one another. When my sister and I were little girls obviously the fighting was a bit more well hidden. Daddy always had a bit of a temper, though he’s cooled down some (in my opinion he could chill out some more though some things never change :-)). However, as we got older the fighting became more obvious and in all honesty it really disturbed me. Especially, since the anger and bitterness would be transferred to the individual relationships. Each interaction became tense. Often after an argument much of the interaction was void of any love or affection. As I take my future children into consideration, I realized that I don’t want my children to see only the disagreements. I want them to see and experience the love and affection that two people share. I do not wish to hide anything from my children.
I have also been considering alternative ways in which I would like to raise my children. I wish to further investigate the ideas of both natural and attachment parenting. From what I have gathered primarily from www.loveparenting.org, such a combination seems to focus primarily on respecting the child as much of an individual as you or I would another adult. A few things that I found to be particularly fascinating and that I would love to really consider giving a shot when I have my own children were
- Full term breast feeding
- More toys that encourage the cultivation of imagination
- Interest led learning
- A possible alternative to public school
- Compassion for my child
- A limited amount of screen time with periodical screen free weeks.
- Answer as many questions as possible for my child
- Demonstrate the behaviors that I would like my child to display.